i wokr up in ohio with no clothes. i think someone gave me ecstacy. can you come find me please it's cold.
I want you more than these girls want KFC
she was giving me head and that cheryl crow 'youre favorite mistake' song came on. she looks up and all i could do was nod
then again I'm sitting on a tree stump completely naked in the dark listening to some type of glee soundtrack.
OMG HE JUST PUKED WITH THE DOOR OPEN WHILE DRIVING ON THE ROAD AND OMG WE NEED TO CHAT BUT NOT ATM CAUSE THERES PUKE ON MY PHONE
you proceeded to scream out that it's your birthday to everyone who walked by before you collapsed in the middle of the street. happy 21st birthday to you.
Only I can have a panic attack in the back seat of a cop car and have them move me to the front seat.
I barely even remember him. He is just a distant beard in my past.
I will fuck him senseless, no need for a priest.
I only have one eye to read your texts because I just stabbed one out after reading that last text.
Taco Bell drive through. Chick got out of the car in front of us and threw up on the hood of my car!
Not okay.
Are you alive?
I googled "I don't want to vomit anymore," and "how to rip out your uvula," at 9 am this morning, but I'm still here. Uvula and all.
What was the name of that place where we saw that concert? It was like a warehouse and some guy was living in the loft above the stage...
It's called: a legit place to drop acid.
Listening to Ke$ha's new single to pump myself up for my STD test.
Well you were listening to music and having sex really loudly. How was I supposed to know you'd hear me making rocket sounds?
I picked up a towel, and butt beads fell out of it.
Oh yeah... Surprise!
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