then for some reason i googled "how much to buy a cannon"
Getting up at 8 this morning to drink could be the best and the worst idea we've ever had
I can't wait until next week, when I find out what drunk me added to the Netflix queue.
dude she was so drunk she thought Jim Joyce made the right call
She carries her pencils in a crown royal bag... Need I say more?
Starting drinking whiskey at eight. Already had ten girls looking up my kilt to make sure I'm wearing it right.
Pot head idea of the day: make a maraca out of weed seeds. Or a rain stick? Definitely rain stick.
This is going to be one of those "I can only do this high" classes
He burnt his arm on the grill, then turned around and started blaming it on the burger buns...I think it's safe to say he's drunk.
How many band members does it take to become The Band Slut? I think I might be dangerously close
I seriously doubt this is the first time pumpkin pie has led to a booty call.
Getting dome in the backseat of a friends car with Ariana Grande playing in the background was probably the most romantic part of my night
There is no issue with you seeing me...morally or ethically. we'll update your resume anyway. I really need to have sex with you later. Really
TELL HER ABOUT THE GODDAMNED MOTHERFUCKING POTATOES
The cat likes watching me spank Michael. I don’t know how to feel about this.
Randomize
