I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
Mystery lines found in a Pyrex dish in the back of my pantry at 415 am. No recall as to it's origin. Unidentifiable taste. Obviously I'm doing them
I think my hand is broken. But his nose definitely is
You're a disgrace to the female race and the love triangle and halloween.
How soon is too soon to enter the slutty phase of this breakup?
That commercial was clearly aspirational. I think Arbor Mist would pair nicely with Oscar Meyer
Ps I'm glad our relationship hasn't progressed into having to get married so we legally can't testify against each other
I do remember telling her that I was about to pass out soon and then hiding my pants under my bed so she couldn't take my wallet even drunk I'm thinking ahead
I love you too! Remember NO alcohol or weed at my residence because of legal ramifications.
The stock is going waaaaay up on that picture of my pussy with a bowtie on it.
How do you forget making out with a coworker in the dressing room at Sears on more than one occasion?
...object impermanence?
I know you just got dumped by your gf but believe there is still good in the world. I just smoked a joint and took a fucking unbelievable poop. Give me a call tomorrow.
Did you pee in the oven last night??
I forgot to respond before, I was apologizing for confusing sex with secret Santa.
I made him dinner in just his cowboy hat and my boots after we did it...you should see his face :)
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