So how was he last night?
Five-minute foot-long.
long story short: there's a file in the master file cabinet labeled "lube".
Sitting in a bubble bath with my bong, how's your morning?
The Fresno prostitute seemed offended all I wanted from her was directions back to the freeway.
got extra credit for showing up to class before a holiday. it hit me 5 minutes later that she meant easter....
Jesus once told his disciples that its better to hang out with your best friend than give some douche bag a bj.
ALL CAPS CUZ ITS SERIOUS SHAME.
I just saw a fat chick ask the bartender to top her corona off with grenandine cuz she has a "sweet tooth" no that's diabetes fatty
I don't want to hear about you making out with a high schooler. I just had the best sex of my life. My face and arms went numb in the middle of it.
Well sundance is in town and Im going to use my one and only shot to bang Taylor swift... Does it count as a random if shes famous?
We were suposed to have a 3some in their bathroom but it just turned into us 2 making out while he watched like a little kid on christmas morning
Dude. Cvs sells sex toys. And my discount works on them. Game on.
We bought a pool from walmart at 2am...and to make matters even more white trash we headed to Applebee's for half off appetizers and corona-ritas
I slept with a Brazillian Man, That's why I'm Watching The World Cup
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
Randomize
