god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
So I called her out for all the gossip she does and she's like "you do the same, bitch"
So I was like "Im classy like the Countess, youre just a bitch like Kim."
Kudos on the Interstate Housewife metaphor.
Hemmingway ran to paris to avoid going to the university of illinois and becoming a doctor. It was there he developed a drinking problem. I need a plane ticket.
bring money and cleavage
I just puked in my fish tank. Helloooooo summer.
I'm currently using two paint brushes as chopsticks to eat lasagna.... college.
Yeah I'm about to go down a waterslide that comes out a 2nd story window. I love college.
I incognito puked under the VIP table. Did Jersey proud.
She gives pretty bad head, but when it's in her dad's Lexus SUV it's tough to complain.
I've just never had a dinner guest strut in, go directly to my bathroom, vomit.. then come out demanding whiskey and food.
Im deleting that text because its a possible ncaa violation
they sound like some classy girls.
Hey, I don't give them daddy issues, I just take advantage of it. The real bad guy here is American parenting.
You peed on someone's house because they had a Wisconsin flag.
I may or may not have just let Ash Ketchum capture my wild Pikachu in a parking lot.
Hold me and let me compliment your butt
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