I wannas sexs uuuuu
I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
I just got a facebook invite to join a group called "bring back the old franzia spout." i never want our generation to grow up.
i don't think my life will be extraordinarily more meaningful if i let him put his tongue in my butthole.
You should have been there to see the look on her face when I told her that my dog gives better head than her. It was a beautiful symphony of shock, anger, and disbelief.
I'm too hungover to be in a fucking cow suit right now
There's two girls at the bar sniffing each others boobs.
I don't know if you remember, but I was only wearing an afghan.
how was it?
he was petting the bushes because they were "napkins"
Just thought you should know the man you CHOSE to father your children has once again fallen asleep on the toilet. thanks mom
I have cobwebs on my vagina for halloween. And bats fly out when I open my legs.
I was so high I didn't realize I'd put on someone else's bra. I thought my boobs had shrunk.
That was the night I passed out and someone threw chicken at me. SORRY I wasn't available to cockblock you from that Hispanic dude.
Well I either feel like the fat girl or very accomplished because his bed is now broken in three places
Don't come up here. Strippers r crying.
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