We just stood on the porch wondering how you managed to puke up a whole piece of bologna
It would be been irresponsible not to make cleaning the apartment into a drinking game
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
She made me be the little spoon then she pretended to be a jet pack for an hour straight
2000 dollars has been put in for bail money. Also we're signing contracts
Nothing better than going to Mass on Easter Sunday with "I love penis" henna tattooed across your back. Love your Indian culture.
i have a raging boner for Saturday, day drinking is one of my top favorite things right next to alligator wrestling and blowing shit up
Ive done some fucked up shit, but last night was the first I have Poured milk on anothers mans face in the shower.
I just got fingered in the Win-Co parking lot for pills. How's your meltdown going?
you don't go into accounting for the pussy....
Hey when you get home, can you do me a solid and throw one of your pregnancy tests on my bed?
EPT or First Response?
Now just crop his dad out and add it to the spank bank.
Do not confuse my plans for being an adult though. I will ABSOLUTELY be practicing suturing, on my porch, while getting stoned.
He's smoked my weed, stolen my cigarettes, and used my campus cash, but I try to initiate sex and NOWWW he's all "As your RA, that's a line I can't cross"
the woman that waxes my lady parts just hugged me...
were you wearing pants?
no.
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