these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
He was from Iceland of course I didnt sleep with him, havent you seen Mighty Ducks 2???
I have a great idea. you just need to get pregnant.
Mother, no, i will not talk about this again. Please stop planning my unborn daughters life. I will not put her in pagents. That is trashy. Stop watching toddlers in tiaras. It is also trashy. I love you.
i just overheard a girl at the next table saying she gave up sex for lent
don't you ever do that...
I think that last shot was nyquil. Please come gte me. WINGS.
You know it's last call at a gay bar when the guys at the urinal are just jacking off in front of each other. Most awkward pissing moment of my life.
Want to run by the liquor store later? Tequila Youn should really be in attendance at Party Mountain. No one else could be our spirit animal.
I asked if anyone's pants felt wet on the bottom, like a half hour after mine did. I had just peed my pants i had gotten so high no biggie
Oh jesus...leave it to you to hit on not one but two guys who can't fuck you till marriage.
It's disgusting. He breathes through his mouth and just sounds fat. Plus he chews all loud and shit.
One minute we were playing beer pong, and the next minute I was sprinting to my apartment with a watermelon. wtf happened in between?
Take off your clothes and see if he wants to have sex, that's a good way to find out
Can you bring me some underwear? I feel uncomfortable going underwear less at a Remembrance Day ceremony.
Nothing says "I'm sorry for shitting in your bed" like an Olive Garden gift card
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