i wish there were pregnant emoticons
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
you went into starbucks asked for a mocha "on the rocks"
Is it creepy to message a girl and say you had me at stocked liquor cabinet?
Missing a small section of hand. Hope your night is going better
No, its ok. Im playing strip pretty pretty princess im currently dueling for the crown
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
I looked up while we were having sex to see him covering my pillow pet's eyes with his free hand. I think I'm in love
Christ, I really took the slutcake last night.
Wait. Someome brought slutcake?
You know what I'm hearing? Blah, blah, blah, I have pneumonia, blah, blah, blah, I'm a quitter. COME OVER AND PUT YOUR PENIS INSIDE ME.
Just bartered a McD's cheeseburger and fries for two pitchers. Oregon Trail ain't got shit on me.
you'll probably come home to me baked as fuck and shirtless
I just have to decide what I love more, food or dick.
some kid just came up 2 me bleeding yelling "thats how u riot"
We hotboxed his bathroom. going to be a good night
Hotbox went wrong - smoke sets off fire alarm. Firefighters coming
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