So I finally got the Patron washed off my boobs.
we lost you for like an hour and then found you at some dive bar trying to teach dance lessons
he kept telling me that god made these magical balloons called condoms
he just chased his shot of tequila with a chicken nugget.. either its a canadian thing or hes wasted
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
Immediate regret. She's like a chihuahua on crack.
Giving my coworkers lap dances cuz it was my turn to decide our team bonding exercise. Go happy hour!
Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
I'm not sure. But a mason jar of drug free urine just as soon as anyone can would be so awesome.
He's on the floor in just a Burberry tie. All my girl parts just tapped out.
You were a for sure 10. You put on a traffic cone to meet someone.
See, this is why we give you shit. Ashley gets her car cleaned out, I get multiple enchiladas made, and you get cum in your eye.
You’ll lick BBQ off my cock but no ketchup on a hotdog?
Someone needs to get Mark off the roof. I told you that he doesn’t shut up about ancient Egypt if you give him henny.
He called my IUD an IED, and said that’s why I had bomb pussy.... I didn’t correct him
Randomize
