white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
he urdandictionary'ed 'tease' on his phone and made me read through all the definitions. Am i really that bad?
You slept in the bed with him... with your top off.... and just made out with him....
I'm going to fuck my way out of the friend zone if its the last thing I do
Its like they don't get that I only talk to them before homecoming, thanksgiving, or any other time I go home. I love highschool girls.
My mom just blew pot smoke into my nose and called me a cat.
Also pregame at mine tomorrow?
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
I had to explain to the waiter that I'm not the DD because I can't drive, but as the Designated 'Make Sure No One Gets Roofied Or Hit By A Car On The Walk Home'-er, I should still get the free drinks.
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
When exactly does a bender just become a lifestyle?
How about we just fuck in random places all around campus, and skip the boring relationship part?
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
And thank god for autocorrect cuz I can't even think in English let alone spell in it right now.
Also I will be receiving my own bra in the mail because I left it at his place, woops
just discovered a semi frightening wound on the side of my head that must have happened last night. if i die of a brain aneurysm, make sure they put "sorry for partying" on my gravestone.
He may be a manwhore, but he’s a very well endowed manwhore
That’s an important feature when it comes to a manwhore
Randomize
