garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
oh wait, my morality sensor is a little fucked up since I almost let my little sister's friend blow me.
Don't put random dicks in your mouth or any other crevice for that matter... and i'm home in 30 seconds
Wish I got that text last night instead of this morning.
but then i turned into a human whiteboard because i thought it was a good idea to bring out markers
The ratio of how much he pisses me off to how much sex i get just isnt working out for me
Woke up with the note 'going outside. Ignore bloody spoon. Be back soon' taped to my forehead. Know anything about it?
You know you come from good stock when you can have a family discussion about excuses to scam pain pills from the doctors
They kept barging in on us saying random shit. At one point they came in yelling room service! and threw soda at us bruising my foot. Weirdest injury I have gotten during sex.
I may quit my job to go be a costumed Jedi at Disneyland.
You walked up to a random girl on the street and asked her for a bite of her pizza...
I think I've been there, but who knows? I drink a lot
We climaxed at the same time during ain't no mountain high enough. Does it get more cheesy or domestic for a non relationship?
I shouldn't have to tell you to stop throwing knives at me.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
So I'm trying to figure out how to talk my boss into allowing pajama day once a week. Any ideas?
Randomize
