Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
I puked last after eating a volcano taco and drinking vodka. I felt like a fucking dragon.
Phosphoglyceraldehydration... why the fuck is this a word
Stripper fight on main stage. It just happened. And it was glorious.
Just heard a guy on the phone saying " ya ill buy the eight ball " then came to my register to ask what asile the sugar substitute is on.
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
Can't promise anything, there's vodka in my thermos
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
He looks like he'd be great Lego character.
She bit a glowstick open. Apparently they burn. We bonded while she washed the chemicals out of her mouth as I did double shots of Jager.
Its official the day you get back into town we are having a going away to jail party for me. My last wish before prison is to shit faced drunk with you, get into a fist fight, and then cuddle up and fall asleep. Just like old times <3
DOMA is dead. I'm definitely going to be the last of our friends to get married now.
Still slightly drunk, sitting in Hyde park village. Two small children are dancing and singing "call me maybe" on the fountain in front of me. Am I hallucinating?
I puked so hard this morning that I peed my pants. I'm a gem.
We are bad people. This is why we are friends. <3
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