They should really pass out barf bags in church
when we were having sex and i started crying and telling you i missed you..why couldnt you stop and tell me how you felt or make me feel better?you kept going...
I'm destined to be knocked up by a sailor
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
First lesson of the year: don't close the bar on mondays
Its like he woke the dragon, and the dragon is hungry for a good dick.
So really what you're asking for is an allowance to not have sex on our futon.
My vibrator looks like a lipstick tube. So does my mace. I just realized the potential problems of keeping them both in the same bag.
Just walked by a girl saying to her friend "honestly you coulda given me any dude and I woulda fucked him"
You should've introduced yourself
It's almost like sex was the ice breaker and now we're sociable at the gym
LMAO. Stop. Men are such gentleman these days. I woke up with no one beside me and you got 6 cents
6 cents and no orgasm 💃🏻🎉
We are so blessed
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?
You know what...ii have the turtles...were together....i love these god damn turtles...
At 10 PM you were shit faced in the kitchen makin nachos... Naked. I wasn't sure what to do besides walk away...
Randomize
