I haven't even gone in yet. I'm sitting in the waiting room playing a game i like to call "Who else is here for AA".
i think i left my bra at your place
It's still hanging from my ceiling fan. Please let me keep it there.
So tasty. Tasty like a vagina with ninjas in it
Some drunk couple just made out on the sidewalk and it reminded me some sweet moments we have shared...
I've come to accept that no matter where I step in our apartment, your underwear will be there.
Saying we were separated at birth, got on a ship and sailed here via onion barrel from Somalia didn't help our case at all....
I just had a flashback of me saying "I'm not ready to be a deadbeat mom" lastnight.
Don't let me forget to bring the toilet inside tonight.
There is a good chance that the other night after a wedding reception i was at that i mailed you a drink coaster.
Lying on this bed is like lying on love and marshmallows and joy
Me hangover (as projected). That sounds like a plan. Ill do it for Mexico
You proceeded to get into a playground school bus and yell "all aboard to Margaritaville!"
I've counted four places at work I need to get laid in. Come help me accomplish this.
Hey, I'm your guy
We could get her a gift basket of Xanax l
All that stuff they told us in middle school about drugs being easy to find was a bullshit lie.
Randomize
