my vagina is like the nba. its where amazing happens.
you didnt remember my name all night. you kept referring to me as "the blonde with the fat ass"
The bride says you won't want any of the single ladies...
Let's let the open bar be the judge of that.
i dont know everytime i see her teeth i get erectile disfunction
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
I think I should just accept my destiny that I'm going to be someone's second wife
My tits sealed my fate
If you can count on one hand the number of times you have actually, truly nearly died this month, then you are not really living yet.
Totally. Bang on. He'll be fine. He might cry into your perfect tits once in a while, but that's the price ya pay.
That bottle of wine took a part of my soul with it.
I called him a "Beautiful Bastard" with "Beautiful Bastard Hair". That is how you pick up a guy from Denmark.
There should be a Doritos delivery van or something.
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
Like seriously how stupid drunk do you have to get befor you start finding dolphin lighters and shit in your undergarments
I blacked out and when I woke up and looked at the counter.. there was a full cake upside down. I dont even understand ...
Randomize
