But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
Smoked a bowl on a rollercoaster. Literally ON. Beat that.
i just bought weed at the top of a mountain, best decision of our lives to go to school in colorado.
Uh, also, Rob told me he felt bad for choking you.
In their defense you were hugging a watermelon for a good portion of the trip
What do I wear to meet his family/put his dog to sleep? Is there even an appropriate outfit for this occasion?
There's a bag in my room with garbage, a thong, fritos, and an electrical cord. I'm assuming it's yours
........yyyyyyeah that's me
Remember last time I drank with my mom? I asked if I got my dick sucking abilities from her.
Just drove by where I lost my sausage gravy virginity
I heard you coughing. Are you choking or smoking? And are you okay?
I guess I'm just gonna have to learn to live with the fact that I'm the guy who takes his pants off at the party and tries to start an orgy
Idk woke up on the suite in someone else's clothing and actually broke my ankle
It was a tough decision either lay in bed or go to work and lay in the stockroom
A real best friend would support the hoe in me. Not remind me of what happened the last time I slept with a boss
Randomize
