when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
Am i fat?
Well i wouldnt let you on top
I mean if she was naked in my room I would talk to her
They wouldn't let me go to sleep at the police station while I was waiting to bail u out. YOU OWE ME
I just pull a splinter from the head of my penis. It was a rough night.
I told him we couldn't hang out because I had strep, he said he's had it once so he couldn't get it again. The sex isn't worth this level of stupidity
You can't possibly imagine how much I miss you. At least I'll always have that hidden folder in my computer.
We stared down the barrel of pure insanity, took more and the electric elephant god rewarded our fearlessness by giving me golden skulls and naked women crawling out of the walls. I love acid
I don't even fuck like that, he just happened to be in the right place at the right drunk.
You Just stopped dancing, looked at me and said "I'm gonna make it rain" Then shook the open box of crunch berries everywhere.
Sexiest use of a semi colon this week, congratulations.
Please don't buy a buttplug. It won't fill the empty space in your heart.
Whose dick am I looking at? There are too many possibilities at the moment.
No I got a fucking mosquito bite on my vagina. Summer is off to a bumpy start.
OH GOD IT TASTES LIKE IT SMELLS
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