walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
So he asked me last night if I would cheer him on while he masturbated...
this guy just used the pickup line "God must have spent a little more time on you" I recognized the nsync lyric immediately.
It's the foolproof way to identify who didn't get laid last night
He was banging holes in the kitchen wall with pots. They tried to pull him away but only managed to pants him. He kept "drumming".
Just because you put plan b in my Easter basket doesn't give you an excuse not to wear a condom.
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
We need large glitter to throw at people to signify our mystic nature
Fuck their feelings and their drinks they will get hit with sparkly confetti
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
ugh I gave him morning sex and he doesn't even text me back for my bagel order
I'm the kind of gay who carries his anxiety medication in case the club scene gets too fierce
.......he just venmo charged me for the burrito I was eating while he broke up with me
For a guy who won't fuck me, your dick is out a lot when we talk.
She used to be cute, back when we were young.
Oh well, so were platform jellies. Shit changes.
You left your phone here
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