i wish swine flu would become a total pandemic so we cld be rid of all the people that are complaining about it
Call me in 2 minutes and go along with what I say. You're hysterical and I must go comfort you asap. He just asked if I was ready to experience sex with a wizard and he wasnt kidding.
The crazy thing is, I dont actually know where the cat is, she said something bout the back of the toilet and a sock.
He said I was like bonnie and clyde all rolled into one but twice as trashy and 75% less clothes...
He obviously understands you completely.
why did your cousin post "out tonight" on facebook? doesn't he know it's only 1 in the afternoon?
shhh don't tell him. it's cloudy out and none of his clocks work
just woke up in the hotel with gummi bears all around me and someone took the tv
we took the tv and as for the gummi bears don't eat them you put em in her vagina
it's official, i've been high in 26 different states, and three different countries.
My weekend will be all about the double d's, desert & debauchery
I can only only sleep there on nights I orgasm cause he snores so loud and if he leaves me hanging one more time ill probably cut off his dick from lack of sleep and frustration
Is it wrong i wouldn't sleep with him because his boxers said #1 dad all over them?
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
you don't even have a vagina so you don't get to tell me what to put in mine
How is it??
I'm drinking Gatorade out of a champagne flute.
Its only once in a life time you get to pick your vcard swiper up from jail
Talk shit all you want but with my new knife sharpener I have a lethal razor sharp pizza cutter. Fuck with me Mario I dare you!
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