so...he totally just used scissors to cut up the weed. a wet paper towel to moisten the blunt....and a blow dryer so it wouldn't be wet. this dude either has the worst case of OCD or has the potential to be the next martha stewart.
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
Like many of my risky ideas this has "burned genitals" written all over it
Do you remember that time on the drunk bus when I kept thanking the bus driver for serving our country?
I literally saw him try to open a beer can with his anus. We need o step up our game.
If you bring chipotle to my house i'll let you eat your burrito out of my vagina
We have 24 days left before I leave for college and 21 condoms left in the stockpile. Are you up for the challenge?
Someone is giving away free yogurt on craigslist. Can I get a ride?
she came into my car to rip lines with our blow dealer as I was writing my essay on anti drug policy, i call it on site research
Welcome to my Tuesday when my lesbian ex girlfriend shows up unexpectedly and gets me drunk and then leaves
We were drunk waiting for tacos and I gave him a handy in the back of the Uber while giving the driver relationship advice. I think I'm handling the whole grad school thing alright.
My hangover headache is somewhere in the Harry Potter scar neighborhood. I can now empathize with that poor bastard.
After an orgasm, I always feel the urge to sing A Whole New World from the move Aladdin and I'm not quite sure why.
I got the security footage. Thank you boobies!
So how do u get your coat out of the coat room when someone is fucking on it?
Randomize
