after we finished he farted and said 'i've been holding that one in'
So...it's hour 4 of day 5 of week 7 of my internship, and so far all ive done is shred paper. all. day. long. it's like working for Enron.
i'm glad we're now at the level of friendship where we can comfortably discuss the quality of our shit
No I'm not coming over. That Bob Ross drinking game is too intense.
She fell out the car soaking wet and screaming "im wearing a fedora!" then tryed to seduce him on the front lawn in front of his middle aged neighbor
screw jello shots the kids from the culinary school made pudding shots with 4 loko.
at what point last night did i decided to have a photo shoot with your camel toe
She roared AMY HORNEY and hulk hoganed her shirt off. Fuckin marriage time bro
It's like shitshowville, population: those girls.
He got kicked out 3 times. I have no idea how he kept getting back in. I saw him walking on the highway the next morning.
There was confetti in my vomit this morning... Happy New Year!!
I mean, that's eating your cake and fucking it too.
I am sitting in my lingerie, eating frozen cookie dough out of a bowl, and watching family. My hump day is going great
You took one look at him and said "let's hope I don't remember this tomorrow" then you took another shot and chased it with a beer.. I guess it was a success.
you walked 30 min all the way back to the dorms at 2am?
i was more bummed that i dropped all my skittles.
Randomize