I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
I just found out me and my parents buy from the same drug dealer.
you should get a family discount.
My mom asked me to donate my child hood stuffed animals to the poor then I realized I was hiding liquor behind them. I told her I was too attached to them. She understood. Wrong in so many ways.
Im going to need an iv of taco bell after this.
After we fucked he shhhh'd me and said your welcome
I'd like to say yes, but I nearly lost my shit when I assumed there was no back to my house. I am not strong enough for hallucinations.
I have effectively turned laundry day into a drinking game.
Dude it was bad... like you fell asleep around the toilet after drinking from the back tank bad.
It's probably because the lack of alcohol in your stomach. Alcohol kills bacteria. I am a doctor. Trust me
it's like his dick is making a u-turn.
Just used the "Buddy" Poppy flower I got from a veteran to clean my one hitter. "I'm proud to be an American"
Don't be the guy that has his dick out at work.
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
my downstairs neighbor came by to say he’s having a huge loud party tomorrow, handed me a toblerone bar, and said thank you in advance for your understanding
He agreed to matching Christmas pajamas today, no guy does that for a girl he’s not seriously considering marrying.
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