nut hugger
He said we were driving the golf cart through the woods screaming 'iceroad truckers' for four hours in the dark
so when i dont talk to her she talks to herself...idk whats worse
btw, i had a dream i drank 260-proof vodka last night. thank god that doesn't exist in real life.
I ishhh haha are u coming nack easyer?
the fact that I know you're asking me if I'm coming home for easter makes me believe I speak fluent vodka.
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
In conversation she brought up that she slept with Tucker Max on the UF football field
It was going alright when lo and behold Tom the cock blocking tornado hits. He is the only man I know who doesn't want anyone to fuck girls.
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
The only word that describes how much hair I shaved off of my ass is "considerable".
the quiet that you are hearing is a silent suggestion that you should go fuck yourself
I can't wait to shower all this regret off of me
burned my penis with a sauteed onion again.
well we woke up in different beds than the ones we originally fell asleep in, you were butt naked, and your boyfriend was sleeping on a cot in the middle of the kitchen. that might be why he's mad.
For the record, if you sneeze while you have a dildo in your vagina and you dont have a good grip on it, that thing can get some distance.
Randomize
