Honey, If i waited till marriage I wouldnt know what a dick tasted like.
Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min
shhh. i hid the ranch dip behind the rooster. don't tell anyone that way you can find it in the morning and it won't be all eaten.
wrong number but thanks
i cant believe i hit a parked car with a pink dildo in my mouth... fuckin epic
We need to go to the store an get depends. I really don't want to be bothered with the bathroom this weekend.
I rode on his Vespa around Florence and fucked him in an empty train. It was like a way sluttier version of Lizzy McGuire
I feel like calling off tonight. Is a strong desire for masturbation a valid reason?
I may or may not have told him that he's "the only one with a PHD in this pussy"... I should like direct cheesy porno flicks or something.
I have vodka and a slip n slide so of you could come over that would be great
Do you think next time you could control the yawn? Kind of a buzzkill to be mid-orgasm and see you yawning over there.
Dude. Cvs sells sex toys. And my discount works on them. Game on.
Immediately after sex he layed on the floor and acted like my yellow bra was pac man
So my mom wants to hear about my weekend. How do I make licking cupcake frosting off your face while high not sound like just that?
I'm seriously considering selling my books back early. I don't use them anyways and I could really use the beer money..
I teamed up with my vagina. I compromised his morals and then she corrupted him for good. It’s been a very successful and slutty partnership
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