There's a girl here with sideburns. I gave her your number, you can thank me later.
is there an easy way to say "i didnt plan on sleeping with you until i saw how drunk you were" ?
alright she left, finally time to fart up the room
So I think I just got a job offer from the guy I used to blow. See, networking pays off.
Have $25 to my name but it's $2 pitchers. I have no choice but to go.
No no no no no. Not interrested. She looks just like Kim's fat booth picture. Only real.
he literaly had a hockey helmet on and was swan diving off the couch onto the coffee table.
I began mixing captain Morgan and jack daniels and called it captain jack sparrow. I puked. a lot.
I just took two shots of Burnerts out of a ladle. Get here now.
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
last night we were hooking up when all the sudden he just murmured "mm blonde". i don't know what to think about this situation.
Thank god I work in a lab. This pinkeye is out of control and my safety glasses are the only thing stopping me from digging at my eye with a pen
I have peed in a lot of sinks
I think I need practice at oral sex
I own a practice facility.
so i might have slept on your bathroom floor last night...
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