Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
Whatcha textin bout Willis?
would you object to me following you around all the time with a video camera and selling it to TV? Your life could make me millions.
he kept whispering yes yes yes yes the entire 15 minutes. i almost wish it was a quickie.
Just sold this kid "Magic Furry Apples". He is way to high to figure out they are just peaches.
At least he's a nutritious stoner...
the spit in my mouth is still 99% not mine.
stuck in the elevator with that hot guy from the 3rd flood. Worried he can smell my spray tan and desperation
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
College is a time for personal growth. Meaning it's time to start using those pickup lines on randos at dive bars.
Just saw the ex while I was at CVS at 3am buying Depends for my heavy flow
Just sitting in the tub googling "how to remove sharpie from skin". You?
my liver is dry heaving
And all i could do was bury the part of me that felt guilty for cradle robbing and put on my dick swallowing bib.
I just gave my boss a blowjob. underneath his desk at work. that promotion is mine!
I JUST NEEDED TO TELL YOU I JUST FUCKED TWO BOYS IN THE SPAN OF LIKE THREE HOURS AND ONE OF THEM WAS MY SISTERS PROM DATE FROM HIGH SCHOOL IM LOWKEY BOTH PROUD AND ASHAMED
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