The walk of shame isn't so shameful when you do it in a stolen, autographed Favre jersey.
i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
dude it was like an art museum there were boobs everywhere
I'm sweating while I eat mac and cheese. That fat.
He walked in, tore open the drawer, pulled out a condom, and slammed it shut. He was that ready.
There is a clear recurring theme of me having sex in restrooms that really needs to stops
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
He tried to stick it in and I asked him what he wanted to name our child and he quit.
bleeding from the face, sitting in a shopping cart and holding a wad of ripped caution tape. what else would i be doing?
After he came, I wiped my mouth on my baby blanket. I could feel nana rolling over in her grave.
My boss just high fived me after finding out i made it through lunch rush rolling on molly. To think this guy used to terify me.
I can't. Currently naked covered in Nair trying desperately to catch his cat that rubbed up on my leg.
I hate that cat.
Listen man, there's two things I know about in life: porn and sound. On a day that I'm wearing khakis, I need you to trust that I know what the fuck I'm doing.
The Wolf of Wall Street “I ain’t fuckin’ leaving!” speech when the cops broke up your party though...
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
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