why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
he kind of looks like leonardo dicaprio...in whats eating gilbert grape
wtf, did you fuck a retard?!
I don't call you at 3 in the morning to start a fucking relationship.
well i had to explain to their mom why the kids i babysit for won't stop repeating the phrase "nice juicy guido"
who were those guys at the table sniffing dryer sheets?
Oh wow. Was walking and just saw her in the pool, fully clothed, ranting on an alligator float. I guess i should go get her before security gets here.
How did I roll 7 times this month and survive?\nI must be some sort of ecstasy goddess
Ok here's the state of the situation: We're alone in a strange city with strange people with nothing but alcohol and sprite, I think we're gonna make it.
He let me finish eating my sandwich while I sat his face. I think I'm in love with this little eager beaver.
Watching the Walking Dead, snuggled up naked, and drinking a beer. No better way.
If ever there was a tweet to describe your life, it's this.
Thinking about wearing all black to the bar tonight since I'll be attending my liver's funeral.
New drinking game, drink every time Rhianna says "Work" in her new song.
That's a gentle way of saying I passed out like an 18-year-old on his first trip to Tijuana
There is a guy down by the river wearing a zebra print speedo and a sombrero, with a beer in each hand, screaming "This is America bitches!"
Randomize
