She'll never know what hit her
I dunno. Girls tend to recognize ball-to-chin contact.
He should be on Bizare Foods after who he ate last night
I think I just met the technical qualifications for binge drinking in five minutes
Her boobs are too amazing to be looking at my dick. I'm even ashamed.
All I know is that we apparently made a drink we named The Single Girl which is rum, vodka, grain alcohol, and sprite and rolled around in the backyard.
Do you ever just look at me and get embarrassed?
It was just like old times except for going to hangover throw up before waking my parents up to open presents. Merry Christmas!
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
I walked in and all four of you were covering your heads under the blanket singing waterslides in unison.
Grandma can hear your bong from the living room, please be more quiet. Love mom.
I dont' remember leaving St. Cloud, getting home, or apparently directing traffic in the middle of the fucking street while black out drunk.
This is why you are going on a date. To see if he is fun or if we need to shank him in the parking lot.
I just got back like 5 minutes ago, I have two champagne bottles that I carried with me on the train home and a Dunkin donuts coffee cup full of stolen butter, I've been in a windowless room for the last 6 hours, time does not exist
what is your life
Free champagne that's what
i just remember singing the theme song from 2 and 1/2 men to my hair
The hump and dump is a beautiful thing
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