The dr is doing well, he randomly asked if I was bi
ya i found him eventually. hes the only one who drinks guiness so I just had to follow the darkest green puke trail
he had a sign stolen from the tennis court hanging above his bed that said, "please limit play to one hour while others are waiting"
Moms kinda upset I threw up in grandmas bedroom. I think ill stay in tonight.
My mom gave me a high five when I told her I was just using him for sex
You and your mom would make an amazing tag team
So i wrote 'don't sex me' on my stomach, so that if we got to a point where my shirt is off - he would know how i really feel, not just the alcohol talking
how did that work out?
Well, all the water washed it off, so we ended up fucking since i didn't have my reminder...
I'm sorry I kept calling last night when you wouldn't pick up. I'm REALLY sorry I sang "You Oughta Know" on more than 4 voice mails.
looking back it was a good thing we were too wasted to fire up the chainsaw
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
I am making pancakes and watching Spongebob Squarepants. My life is a waste of youth.
I don't remember much but I think I'm wearing your underwear, and for that, I am extremely grateful.
Just stared at a tree for a solid 5 minutes because I thought a German Shepard was perched on a limb.
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
I just talked with someone about real estate trends in Atlanta then got three blowjobs in a row. Boom.
Randomize
