It is pretty awful out and I still haven't put on pants yet.
ready 4 sex 2nite?
wow. woo me matt, woo me.
OMG THIS GUYS LICENSE PLATE IS GETTNHRWET
ok watching intervention on tv. when i hit rock bottom - i wanna be THIS chick.
I'm sitting the next couple hours out. Puking in a potted plant really put shit into perspective for me.
Hey bro, did you ever hear from the background investigator that i was supposed to bang?
He introduced himself to me as "the gayest gay who ever gayed." I like him already.
He just showed up at my house and was like "have you seen an axe laying around?" he wasnt wearing any shoes.
Good. We don't answer calls at dick thirty.
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
Would it be weird if your parents sold me weed?
Now I'm ashamed that I wore a bra
making my breakfast out of the pot brownies we made last night. Safe to say it's time to go grocery shopping.
Don't tell him that you hope he dies in a boring missionary position with his wife. That doesn't go over well.
Our orgasm ration was 1:45. No. Fucking. Joke. I thought I was going to die.
Randomize
