I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
Totally about to meet up with Ryan in an empty parking lot. Expect to fuck him. Yes I know it's 3am. Slutty? Possibly. Excited? Damn right.
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
At CVS buying just condoms. The guy behind me is buying just hotdog buns. There was a silent moment of understanding between us.
Dude they are all farmers and I'm pretty sure there's a prostitute here.
I should probably go to bed before I start to care about why I started drinking in the first place.
Just induced vomiting to put out a carpet fire.
Everyone is cheering
Im going to bed. I'm seeing 7 of everything and my world smells like gravy
Also I owe you 20 bucks, a clean towel and a glass of scotch. I'll even throw in a blow job
She's not a foreskin expert like you
Some girl just ordered Chinese delivery to her therapy appointment...
Yeah. Still not happy that my prof saw a picture of my vag.
This has to be the weirdest conversation I've ever had sober and in the middle of the day before.
I knew I'd like her from the moment she supported me messing around with my co-worker on my lunch break
I want you to remember that you started masturbating in front of a car full of people. That drunk.
Randomize
