There's some strange man with hair that keeps talking to us. I'm scared.
This is how horror movies start. Going to bar with strange hair guy. He's paying. Bad idea?
Ditched hair man. Got free cab ride to market. Want food. I win.
CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
I'm at a Rock of Love themed party. New high? New low? I can't tell.
Wait. Scratch that. It's not themed. These girls are just sluts.
At least with the last gf I made it clear that I wanted to breakup when I pissed on her floor @ 3am as her roommate watched in contempt
I have some memory of taking a dump in a guitar case.
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
in the event i get tipsy, my nipples are your responsibility
Pretty sure I tied my shoes laces together to keep myself from driving drunk. Fell like six times. Keep forgetting
I got kicked out because I puked again I'm on the fire truck outside
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
He has a shower chair now. So he sits and watches me shower. It's kind of creepy.
I'm at home, drinking with my cat. While this is an enjoyable lifestyle, other plans are preferable.
Got to the gym, getting changed, found a jello shot in my shoes.
To describe how high he was he said, " I'm cocked out of my ape sandwich" so yes...that was some pretty good weed.
Congrats, you are the first person our bartender ever met that actually needed wheeled out of a bar in a wheelchair. He said you were his hero.
Randomize
