She told me she was a cowboys fan... I told her it was a waste of a perfect set of tits
My friend is getting herself a tramp stamp that says "property of the half blood prince".
Hey! Thanks for asking, but it didnt go well. He threw up in the car on the way to dinner. Blind dates arent for everyone.
just saw a man remove a wedgie from his lady's ass. who says chivalry is dead.
we live in such a classy society.
YOU CAN RENT MIDGETS ON CRAIGS LIST
I told you not to ruin your birthday surprise!
I have realized now that neither the top nor bottom of a bunk bed is safe for sex....
i had confetti in my bra
i still find it in random places like a shoe or my car. that week haunts me
Is there a word for someone who only has sex with NFL prospects?
I don't care if I just threw up. You kiss me now. This is marriage.
She wouldn't put out on the first date. I think my boner put a hole in my mattress.
If you two are having sex, stop. I have something really important to ask you about psychics.
Watching my ex make out with another girl is weird.
But she's wearing a jumpsuit so I feel better.
I mean, I already put pants on today. We're already halfway there
for the record im never blowing a guy on the toilet again, that was sad and degrading
My psychiatrist just sent me a dick pic
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