Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
I'm tuning in to watch Heidi Montag crash and burn on the Miss Universe Pageant. Somebody call 911. and I'm not talking about the Sean Kingston song.
Was just shown the photos from a professional photoshoot my aunt had for their dog...not drunk enough for this...
Currently bar hopping with 30 Navy SEALS. I know i'm safe but damn its hard to pick up chicks when you feel like a big pussy.
i've never smoked before...when you said wake and bake i thought you meant like a funeral bbq or something
He is in the front yard trying to catch birds out of the air with a fishing net.
Apparently I was holding on to a pizza crust for hours last night.
he was banged his ex for coke the whole time and is still the best guy so far this year. standards need to be raised.
heres the thing, we have 120 cans of beer left in the fridge. until thats finished we cant fit food in the fridge
I called her 20 times. Apparently she went home to do MORE shots before bed. Didnt miss me until this morning. WHO FORGETS THEIR HIGHSCHOOL SISTER AT A FRAT?
She thinks I come over for the sex, but I really come for the snacks.
I'm just saying; the box truck will cost less then dorms or rent, and we can always crash where the party is.
So after taking my shirt off, he pulls my bra off like a hockey jersey. FUCKIN PRO. Guy knew what he wanted.
I think he should just go away to a small penis island and never come back
hi I'm Emily and I thoroughly enjoy getting minors hammered.. I'll start my AA intro just like that.
Randomize
