I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
First off: I'm drunk so fuck you. Second: you weren't a bad girlfriend. Tres: thats 3 in spanish. Number 4: fuck 3 Doors Down
He told me i was the nicest person he's ever arrested for DUI
I just watched a woman in a full wedding dress and veil walk out of the chinese buffet...I no longer believe I have a problem, and am afraid I am underdressed.
there's a guy pushing a keg up the street in a shopping cart. you have to love graduation
When I left you were in the shower in your socks throwing up screaming it was blood but it was "ok" cuz it's recyclable. By the way it was kool aid.
Found my ex-boyfriend's money stash. Call the girls, we are getting fucked up tonight, my treat.
I consider any night I don't make out with someone a bad night. So I've been great.
I feel like I missed the land of milk and honey and instead wound up in the land of beer and pizza. And yet, I think I'm happier here.
I was apparently the best non-Irish person at the party. I wore my skating dress, Austrian flag and a giant shamrock. Everyone is calling me "30 Shots Girl".
I'm so proud of us for not dying.
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
I just woke up to my family in the living room watching our security camera tape of me last night talking to a stop sign in our backyard... How the fuck did I get that in the yard?
wheres my face? and why is my pocket so big?
No. No. Fuck you! You can do your own grocery shopping.
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