and we just had intercourse last night so i'm exhausted, fucked up on adderol, emotionally broken and just pissed
I'm cheating on the girl I'm cheating on my girlfriend with
Dude, I couldnt get it up cause she said her parents were home...
ok, come over...I have doritos
do you want me to make hamburgers?
i'm vegan
i'll put lettuce on them
hanging on that rope, lady gaga looks exactly like a used tampon
all i know is that if they can hide that much blood in her outfit, they definitely could have hid a penis
So Delta doesn't take cash. I used my card to buy a drink and asked the attendant if she could leave it open.
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
The gyno asked how many partners i've had... I said ummmm she goes ok then i'll just put down ten.
i don't understand how she was down there for so long, she's like a mermaid, a blowjob giving mermaid.
God my Facebook chat is a graveyard of old blowjobz
it's like my freshman wet dream come true
I just watched a guy smoke weed through a French Horn. He is my hero
Are you responsible for the syringes and miniature cactus garden that has magically taken over my fridge?
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
Thanks for driving us home last night. Also, blanket apology for anything I may have said/done. I blacked out sometime near the t-shirt cape incident
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