That girl would be great looking if she lost 1000 pounds and cut off her head.
New rule: no balls on the kitchen counter.
So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
When I say rough sex, and show you scars from past encounters, pulling my hair a little IS NOT GOING TO CUT IT. And he just doesn't understand.
Is a wave an appropriate goodbye when your one night stand wakes up and walks out towards the door while you are looking through the garbage for the evidence of a condom?
Hey, remember when Hot Stuff played in the back of the ambulance? Or no, cause of your concussion...
This is why Helen Keller didn't drink
I'm going to make out with someone. I'm on a mission. I don't even care if I'm wearing beer goggles. As long as he's not shorter than me, gay, or a woman.
And then you told me I had large hands and looked like a girl who would have an illegitimate child that I never talked about
Let's celebrate that I used a condom
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
Everyone says she blew me in the bathroom, so I believe it, I just don't REMEMBER.
When I walked out of the bathroom and you were literally dancing, you looked at me and said 'this is how I dance'. And then continued.
I showered three hours ago and yet feel the need for another one already. This is my day.
Randomize
