would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
My friend is getting herself a tramp stamp that says "property of the half blood prince".
She tried to wake me up by touching my dick. I kept pretending to be asleep.
The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
i just was bootyclappin in front of homeless men in a back alley
My dry heaving is complicating my ability to speak.
We're doing it in the traditional way of discussing why we dislike each other while sharing a bowl. Just like the natives do.
What is she getting? Last time we talked her behavior was conducive to getting a tramp stamp on her face.
I love our relationship. We just get drunk, show each other our tits, demonstrate sexual positions and make pasta. Then you go to bed and I sit around with your mom and cry about how proud of you we are.
You were doing bacon vodka shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce. You're officially fucking disgusting. I love you.
It's a sad statement on my day when the high point was getting a pap test.
In unrelated news guys should not ask what I'm doing/wearing if they can't handle an honest answer. I'm not pretending I'm not sitting on the couch in yoga pants watching Community so you can beat off.
My liver appreciates your vow of avoiding matrimony
I just made myself orgasm twice and Laura lee hit 4 million subscribers. It’s a good day everywhere
couldn't remember his name. introduced him as 'mr multiple orgasms'
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