I learned to sign I want to be on you today
Score
Deaf chicks here I come
any plan I had today of being a productive member of society, I am officially throwing out the window.
cum and cheesecake for breakfast...don't fucking tell me pride week isn't awesome
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
Just climbed to the top of a frozen waterfall! Do you want to do drugs tm night? The two are unrelated.
I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE.
just to let you know its hard to talk to your father while being fingered up against a car..
What drink are we having for lunch?
No he can't help me find his house he is strapped to a stretcher facing the opposite direction
So... crashing at the hot bartender's place is not a solid marital decision.
No I have an idea, I saw you running through the neighborhood at 3am while I searched for my flip flops in a ditch
My roommate walked in naked grabbed my hand and pulled me into her room to see her randoms dick.
I drank so much that my feet don't feel like my feet
Ladies don't puke and tell
Wait... so you had sex and then your ear drum ruptured? I'm not sure if I want to ask if the two are related...
Randomize
