Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
I give him blow jobs while he watches sports.. how am I not his gf yet??
He's a firefighter, who has his own band. I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
We've gotten 3 pitchers already by trading for CUPCAKES
I'm already too high to be publicly presentable. I just looked at myself in the mirror without my sunglasses. Debated contacts. Said aloud "But I'm nothing without my sunglasses."
But how do I turn off the feelings though?
Vodka.
Well i would have gone to the bar but Satan decided to hold his rituals in my uterus.
Um went out in San Francisco last night and ignored someone hitting on me. So they bit my arm. Lmfao PLEASE TELL ME THIS ISNT THE SINGLE LIFE
Good, I don't think Coke dipped ring pops hold up in the mail anyway.
YOU HAVE TO STOP TELLING BARTENDERS WE DON'T HAVE MORAL STANDARDS
God bless the petty bitch who invented screen shot
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
I want sex. When is an appropriate time post funeral to ask for something like that. Like when it gets dark out?
on a scale from 1 to "can't put a toothbrush in your mouth without gagging" how hungover are you?
Woke up at 5am in an elevator... Pretty much tells you how my weekend went.
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