YOU CAN RENT MIDGETS ON CRAIGS LIST
I told you not to ruin your birthday surprise!
don't worry dude, we didn't fuck on your bed out of respect for you
couldn't find a condom?
basically
and ill be dreaming of you. not in a creepy way, but in an inappropriate way
Apparently Bin Ladens last act of terrorism is cock blocking me....
we've got reservations. ask for the eat a bag of dicks table
We're at the hospital. She got a head rush and fell and now blood everywhere. Smoke the rest, just save her a bowl
Oh shit I just realized the ropes are still tied to the bedposts
Dont make this weird.... I was wondering if I could paper mache a few of your dildos this weekend?
Well. Turns up no one actually knows who that kid was. Came in, said happy fathers day, chilled for a while, then left.
Well, for starters, she called the condom a "dick mask."
We took it as we must go to waffle house or else we will upset the gods.
He better not be in your backpack
We're just Facebook friends. Use guy logic. I tapped your wife in high school, 20 years and 60 lbs ago, when she was hot and experimental. Why would I mess with that now? It would ruin the vivid memories of her that I keep in my spank bank.
I will find you...
According to timehop today marks the 3rd anniversary of my 1st blackout
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
Randomize
