Peanut Butter and turkey sandwich...this may come back to haunt me
I would have added her but her profile pic was piece of pie
That bitch ruined vodka saturday
That penis will go down in history. It's the Helen of Troy of dicks. I will conquer it and the tale will live on for future generations to learn from
I am more familiar with your toilet than I ever want to be with any appliance
dude Steve you don't even know. its just been one hairy asshole after another.
im at work. we just had a random 14-year-old amish girl come in and gift us with cinnamon rolls as thanks for letting her use the bathroom. i dont even know.
I say go for the trifecta and maybe you'll get a medal or something. Or a baby. That's like the same thing right?
My period started right as he was entering, which really helped me sell the "I've never done this before" bit.
But I am still fully ok with my life choices as long as the consequences aren't onesies and pacifiers
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
Sorry I told all the other bridesmaids you were an asshole. I had had a few drinks and it's how I felt at the time.
I had to google some of the kinky sex shit she was telling me she was into.
If that is not a reason to propose to her then I don't know what is
You know I base where I go on the likelihood of me getting laid there. This includes work.
she's 6'2. you bet your ass i slept with her.
Randomize
