I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
so I guess it's not okay to mix vodka and ..everything and then proceed to offer a lap dance to ...everyone.
Just found the book "How to Stay Christian in College" on my roommates desk. At a loss for words...
I miss your penis. And I totally say this as a friend. I just miss it because it's great. You should be very proud of it.
Just drive me around campus, I will be able to smell their innocence.
drunk enough to drink jager bombs out of a bowl on the kitchen floor.
HE IS COURTING ME WITH CHINESE FOOD AND IT IS WORKING.
siamese drinking twins saturday is a go ... bring duct tape.
I hate that you live in a gated community. I feel your guard judges me every time I go to your house at 3 am an leave at 5am
I just did the walk of shame..with a blanket and a cup that says i will out drink all you bitches. This was not how i pictured 25.
She bought my penis dinner and beer last night. Her words
I just used my vibrator to scratch my back. This being single shit is for the birds
Do the right thing and go fuck yourself off a cliff
Just so you know. And I'm telling you this because I care deeply for you. Blue raspberry poptarts taste exactly the same as the regular raspberry ones.
I promise it wsnt a penis when i put it in my mouth
Randomize