He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
Um I just overheard that the new guy spent a month in jail. Obvi another great hire.
she was using bread to soak up the vodka off the floor then proceeded to eat it.
just woke up to a get well card i wrote myself when i was drunk. it was by the advil. i am a cocky bitch.
I told him he was probably the first guy to get fucked while wearing Star Wars pyjamas.
Yeah play it cool maybe put in a kissy face though let him know you're giving an invitation for his dick
Client visitor days are the worst. If I have to wear a tie and can be hungover at least have the decency to find some more attractive visitors
He tried to tell me that that stripper was his aunt..
If my emotions are below a 3 or above a 7, I'm crying
Cancelling your gym membership calls for alcohol.
I almost had a threesome in a giant beanbag chair. I love college.
Wait I can't come yet Mr. Brightside is playing
ok i defs just took my shirt off in the middle of a frat party though so keep me updated
Well when we Get drunk it gets rowdy. We could always attempt self-control. But historically and statistically speaking, we fail at that.
If you fuck her..... You will be in great danger. Like in so much danger it would be like walking into a pit of crocodiles who haven't eaten and you also just stole their baby.
I never thought I'd be on my couch watching Star Trek, getting my tits rubbed while crying.
Randomize
