She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
she looked me in the eyes and called me a poet because i was singing lady gaga, then she fell over...
I have sucked so much dick this week I think I am going to start sweating semen
Thanks for the menagerie of condoms on my desk
It's the use of SAT words like that which make me want to use them on you
Would it be inappropriate to do lines in front of the cable guy?
Forgot to mention...Pamela Anderson has HPV, so i feel like im in good company
So fucked up. Can't tell if I'm starving or about to puke. Playing it safe and eating froot loops. Tasty in, colorful out.
I decided staying home, watching porn and masterbating was a much better choice than the gym. And I was right.
I'm seriously considering refraining from drinking on school nights.
I like how you say that with 4 school days left of the school year..
I have alcoholic tendencies but you know what? College
He's like a father figure to me, except we have casual drunk sex every now and then
I woke up to his balls in my face, so naturally I limboed under him and headed to the bathroom. When I came out he was asleep on the floor.
Sooooo drunk. We had the best sex ever and after he looked at me and said "That's whats up". I looked at him weird and he said "Young Jeezy would say it" and passed out on me naked. I think i might be in love
I am coming home with the worst sun burn of my life, two unused condoms, and an unworn slutty dress. Worst. Bachelorette. Party. Ever.
So you're willing to shred any respect that you had for your body on some random chick who's only looking for sex? That's the worst thing I've ever heard.
I mean, it won't be 100% meaningless, I know her middle name.
Randomize
