I mean we're not committed. He's my first choice, sort of like miller lite. When I'm at the bar I'm going to order one, but if they don't maybe I'll go for a bud or blue moon. I'm certainly not going to stop drinking
woke up this morning with a fat chick but she went downstairs and made pancakes without saying a word.
Woke up next to my bed in a pile of skittles, sleeping on a pair of sweatpants. I can't believe the girl didn't stick around..
So the next three days will be henceforth known as the 'celebration of the end of the most irresponsible years of my life' be prepared to wake up naked in a ditch.
A few days ago I apparently came up, asked her to make me soup, and handed her a can of coconut milk.
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
He made me put my cow print vest and my cowboy hat from my ' sheriff woody' costume and said I'll show you a woody. What I charmer huh!? I love make up sex
Dude at one point I lost you only to find you sitting in the bushes eating pizza.
I need to be put in a corner surrounded by pamphlets of stds and babies
And besides a nice relationship, I just really want to get laid damnit
Unless your apology includes a 20 something with loose morals and a daddy complex, I'm am not interested
now acid just makes me think of crab ragoon
Dude my toilet did not deserve what I just did to it
Is this making any sense, because I’m puking and trying to be Philosophical right now
I like that they’re all named Christopher or Chris. No need to worry about moaning during!
Randomize
