when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
New record: 45 minutes. Afterwards I played We Are The Champions while we cuddled.
i just found an uncooked ramen noodle in my underwear
hot pretzels for dinner, snacks, and now breakfast...oh to be a poor college student...everyday is like a carnival.
just had dinner with my dad's new gf and her daughter.. had to drink a beer to get through it.. she's 19 she has on a disney watch and snowflake earrings
So I cleaned the toilet last night at 2 am and woke up with pink eye. Never doing that again.
I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
Dude. All those hangovers I never had came back with a vengeance. I just opened the door of this car to barf. The car was not motionless. We are on the autobahn.
I'm sitting in front of a fan naked drinking Gatorade. Motherfucking hangover probs
He sent me a vid of himself jerking off. I hope his hands are the size of tennis rackets or it will be a very short date.
So I got my junk pierced since we've fucked. You should get in on this.
fries before guys. food before dudes. shakes before dates. chips before dicks. lemon bars before football stars. macaroni before screwin' tony. what i'm saying is please come to ladies' night
Yeah just had sex and grub hub came right after he did. I’d say it’s a win.
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
If I don't get alcohol poisoning from tonight I don't think i ever will.
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