Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
Considering that my ex-wife dumped me to become a lesbian, the Universe owes me a threesome.
You text me last night that you invented a new food. Cheese-less grilled cheese. Congrats, you made toast.
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
in mid cry she says "I can be a whore if I want to"
So..he has a girlfriend BUT she rarely writes on her wall and is only in 5 of his 371 tagged photos and her default pic is her with some other dude. It cant be serious
Oh my god you need to get off of facebook.
Your roommate from freshman year just had a baby. I think you're winning. Hooray for fifth year seniors!
I think having a vagina should be considered a skill, give me a break.
I threw up in the darkest corner of the bar last night, then watched 2 girls freak out in disgust after walking through it. I then realised I puked on the dancefloor, took a picture and proceeded to send it to my mom.
There's a naked man in my car right now.
doing the walk of shame back to your house in nothing but a bed sheet was definitely not one of my proudest moments..
Last night at the bar you we're seriously going up to people and pushing through them like they were bowling pins and you were a bowling ball
I can't believe you're forcing me to handle this hangover sober
I was drunk in the shower and i decided to shave. Im now bleeding to death
So do you guys remember Danny from Tinder?
Sorry I only remember personality traits, not names.
Randomize
